If the speed of light is 186,000 miles per second, what is the speed of dark?
Why do ships have portholes but not starboard holes?
Who decided that all aircraft carriers’ islands are on the starboard side of the ship?
Do you recall when calling someone a politician was not considered an insult?
Why is it that whenever you have a moment of brilliance in the middle of the night it is always followed by a moment of stupidity by choosing not to write it down?
How is it that the man who can remember every play of his favorite team in every game cannot simply remember what he should get at the supermarket?
If we get better gas mileage driving slower rather than driving fast and we get better gas mileage avoiding stop and go driving, wouldn’t our gas mileage be terrific if we just drive at five miles per hour and coast through stoplights and stop signs?
Do people who never use their turn signals believe they will get a better deal when they trade in their car?
Speaking of trading in a car, why is it that the ding you barely noticed is considered by the dealership to be the sign of a major collision?
When a loved one tells you what he or she wants for the next birthday, why is it always at a time when you cannot write it down?
When that birthday comes, does that person scowl at you and say, “I told you what I wanted!”?
Why do people who just finished reading a book or going to a movie feel the need to tell you everything, including how it ends?
Stan Glasofer, our friend and columnist, passed away in October 2020. He left with us some of his unpublished columns and with permission and encouragement from his loving wife Janet, we are happy to share them with our readers.